Dear Qui Talks: “When African American Woman Steps Out of the Pool their Hair Comes Out Ugly.”

Dear Qui Talks,

I haven’t been out with the girls for almost a year now. The first night I finally step out, I get into an amazing conversation with an Ethiopian man, who tells me (a Haitian), my friend (a Dominican from Dominica), and his fellow Ethiopian roommate/hookup…“I love my African American woman but you steps out of the pool your hair comes out ugly. You guys were cursed with bad hair. I feel sorry for you guys.”

I think to myself. “Hmmm…here we go!”

Then he proceeds to exclaim how the African American community needs to unite. We keep playing the victim and need to come together to overthrow!

At this present moment, my Dominican (from Dominica) friend was arguing, back and forth, with him for over an hour. I listen to him both say ignorant and relevant things. I silently sat with his agitated roommate/hookup and ate all his fries. (He offered them. Plus he was too busy to eat.)

Out of the three girls in this conversation, I am the darkest and my hair is the kinkiest. I have been fighting this battle about the way God made me, since birth. Some people, you do not argue with, you just simply educate. Honey, that man was not the man to waste your energy. So….I ate his fries!

At the end of the argument. I am finally ready to state my opinion. I say to him…“I listen to you speak from the beginning of the night until now. I listen to you call your own Ethiopian friend’s hair ugly at its natural state. Now, do not get me wrong. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Especially since we’ve all walked different walks. However…how do you expect us to come together and dominate if the people on our team are saying the very same thing the enemy is saying? It’s like a mother telling her kid to strive to be the best, but whispers in their ear you will never amount to anything. Which do you think will have more of an impact? How do you expect us to unite? You have to use your brain. The kids you produce will have the same hair.”

He didn’t say anything at first. Then says, “I never thought about it like that?”

Talkers, tell me what you think. How do you feel about both comments? Listen to the story this Friday on my podcast “Dear Qui Talks.”


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